All I know is that I have absolutely nothing figured out. And I hate those that do.

I’m going to go ahead & admit that I’m completely jealous of the couples that are my age that have it all together. How exactly did I end up living in the Amityville house working only part-time with a shower that doesn’t work & sitting in the floor? I’m not sure.

I’m jealous of the girl from work that got married 2 weeks ago, already purchased her house a year ago with the new hubby & they had already purchased new furniture as well. I never got those things. I don’t own a house. Most of my furniture (except my new couch that will be here next week-yay!) are cheap hand-me-downs. They’re already talking about starting a family (the only reason I know this is because of break room talk)…I can’t even afford a pet.

I don’t even speak to a good friend of mine from college because of my jealousy. I know, I know, I’m a terrible person! Judge me. But, she & I graduated together, got married less than 2 months apart, but she’s got it all figured out. She & her husband make triple what J-Bird & I make in a year, they purchased a house a couple of months ago, they look so happy, they have nice things, they each have a car, so on & so forth. J-Bird & I? Share a car. Share our house with Nick. I know, I know, I should be thankful for the things I DO have. But, then that’d be missing the point of my ranting post.

I’m jealous. I’m jealous of the people who have it together. I’m trying to pinpoint exactly where I went wrong. Was it when I decided to major in art in college? Or was it because I took 5 years instead of 4 years to graduate? Maybe it was because we moved only 2 weeks after graduating. Or maybe because I got fired from my internship a month after we moved. I could have been because we then choose to move AGAIN. Who knows at this point?

I just wish I could figure it out. Buy some furniture. Live in a nice place. Get a pet. Have a stable job making decent money. Get another car. C’mon. I’m not asking to run the freaking universe here.

BrennaG.

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